"Go West (Bank), young men!"

.
"And now, behold, the LORD hath kept me alive... while the children of Israel wandered in the wilderness"
-Joshua 14:10

My wife and I were just in the West Bank

... not on purpose.

We were driving in a rental car with some friends and got lost.
Yeesh.

There are no athiests in a rental car that's lost in a DMZ.
You want to see some tense Jews?

I've said it before, and I will repeat it now, because it's so true: IT'S ALL RELATIVE!
I feel lost in Jerusalem, understanding about 70% of what I hear and read, unsure if the label on the can of chickpeas means "On Sale" or "Rat Poison."
Watching TV, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu says, "For all of our problems there are solutions." I think he says, "For all of our problems there are mushrooms."

But in the West Bank, around Jenen and Nazareth... Farsi and Arabic? Squiggly lines and dots. The only familiar logo was Coca-Cola. I was lost!

After driving around aimlessly for two hours, we passed a military check point. We should've asked for directions from the Israeli soldiers who were stationed there.
We did not.
We drove for 2 more hours and asked directions from three separate gas stations, and finally we pulled into an Arab gas station, where 3 hairy, husky fellas were standing.
I got out of the car and my wife remained inside... just in case her short sleeves offended the men we didn't want them to, y'know... murder us.

In my broken Hebrew I asked if anyone spoke Hebrew or English.
Arabs and Israelis give directions in the same exact way-- they call over 5 friends and ask them, and when they don't know, they bring over the oldest guy with the fewest teeth. As it turns out, HE spoke Hebrew.
"What happened?" he asked.
I answered: "We go, for long time, but not know where are we. We go around around, but no find city by name Netanya. Can you help to me?"

"Oh, very easy. Go straight, straight, then right."
No matter where you are going in Israel, the directions always start "Straight, straight" -- "Ya-shar, Ya-shar."
The old guy was correct. We were on our way.
A little later we passed a second military checkpoint, this time we asked for directions from the Israeli soldiers. One guy didn't know, he called over two other officers, they called over two more.
Then their senior officer shouted from from twenty feet away, "It's easy. Go straight, straight.."

Arabs and Israelis, so similar...


So we made it out of there, no harm done.

But we learned an important lesson: always ask for directions.


"Lo, then would I wander far off, and remain in the wilderness. Selah."
- Ps. 55:7

"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming." - Dory, from "Finding Nemo"
.