EMPATHY-- Find out what it means to me

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An important life lesson-- Know your audience.
Whenever you give advice to someone, or brag to someone, or....actually, ever really TALK to someone--- Know what they WANT to hear, NEED to hear and CAN hear.

Example:

I am in the midst of reading the 150 Psalms, attributed to the pen of King David.

When the Psalms were written the Jews had it pretty tough.
Now, most experts estimate their inception being between the 11th century and 6th century BCE... Not that it really matters-- any time over the past four thousands years was a pretty tough time for the Jews.

Persecuted, being murdered for their beliefs, treated like... well, basically like something you'd scrape off the bottom of your shoe.

And one thing people need in times of trouble-- Mother Mary to comfort them, speak some words of wisdom...
Actually, that's not Jewish at all!

People need hope! People need something to cling to! They need to know they are not alone.

They need the Psalms.
Not only were the Psalms an outlet for the writer to vent (i.e., kvetch) about his/her frustrations (there are some obvious references to the Babylonian Exile of the Jews from Ancient Israel, 586 BCE-- bummer!), but I believe they were included in the canon of the Bible because they are the ultimate words of empathy and proverbial shoulder to cry on.

The writer of the Psalms knows that Life isn't always fair, and the reader of the Bible needs some empathy.

They let the reader know-- you're not alone.

Here is an excerpt from arguably the most famous Psalm-- 23 (oooh, good title):
"He restoreth my soul... Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me."
Not surprisingly, this is usually recited at graveside funerals of Jews and Christians alike. It makes sense-- it's filled with the idea that God invigorates one's soul (perhaps an allusion to the afterlife) and God helps us when we feel like we're in "the valley of the shadow of death" (Amen, Coolio, you said it). When would someone feel like that? When they've just lost a loved one, and they're in a cemetery (which is literally a valley of the shadow of death).

The following Psalm is recited at a Jewish house of mourning:

"I will say unto God my rock, Why hast thou forgotten me? ...
... they say daily unto me, Where is thy God?
Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God."
(42:9-11)

OF COURSE people who've just lost a friend/relative recite this Psalm! It's clear that they are feeling the same way.
And the Psalm tells us-- "Hey, you're not alone. Everybody gets bummed out, everybody feels forsaken by God now and then. Hang in there."

"I have found that the only I can deal with it is-- Find other people who had similar experiences and talk to them. It doesn't cost anything."
-- Craig Ferguson, late night talk show host, recovering alcoholic

The following MIGHT AS WELL be a Psalm:

"When the night has come, and the land is dark/
And the moon is the only light we'll see/
No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid/
Just as long as you stand, stand by me"

-- Ben E. King, Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller.


And finally:

"Some...times in our lives/ We all have pain, we all have sorrow/
But... if we are wise/ We know that there's, always tomorrow"

-- Bill Withers, "Lean On Me"

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